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Help, ek versmoor!

Lynette Beer • Apr 25, 2019
Help, ek versmoor! | Lynette Beer

Rina Hugo het in die 80s ‘n treffer gehad met die naam, “’n Tikkie vryheid” waarin sy sing: “Ek raak bang, want die kring om myself raak te nou. Net 'n tikkie vryheid, dis tog al wat ek vra. Waar ek fantaseer en droom en dink en niemand my pla.”

Elke mens het ruimte nodig waarbinne hulle vrylik kan asemhaal en hulself kan wees. Presies hoeveel ruimte nodig is, verskil van mens tot mens. Dis juis hier waar die popo soms die die spreekwoordelike waaier kan tref, want ons verstaan nie altyd dat ons wederhelftes, ouers, kinders of vriende nie soos ons dink en optree nie.

Die ding is, niemand kan 24/7 in mekaar se geselskap wees en alles van vroeg tot moeg saamdoen sonder dat daar wrywing van een of ander aard ontstaan nie. Elke mens het, soos wat hulle op Engels sê, “breathing space” nodig. ‘n Kans om net op hul eie te wees. Hul eie ding te doen, sonder om elke aksie, reaksie en gedagte met ‘n ander te deel.
Paartjies wat al lank en gelukkig saam is, sal vir jou sê, dat elkeen steeds hul eie stokperdjies of belangstellings het. Ja, hulle geniet dit om dinge saam te doen, maar daar is ook tye wat elkeen hul eie ding doen. Dit bring balans. Dit bring perspektief. Dit gee baie keer weer nuwe lewe aan ‘n verhouding as hul soms bietjie weg is van mekaar.

Dit geld natuurlik nie net vir die huwelik nie, maar elke ander verhouding waarin jy jou kan begewe. Ouers moet veral daarop let om nie hul kinders te versmoor nie, maak nie saak of hulle 4 of 40 is nie. Kinders, vriende en wederhelftes is nie ons besittings waaraan ons moet vasklou om lewe en dood nie. Hulle is mense. Elkeen individueel geskape met ‘n spesifieke doel. Gun hulle die vryheid om daardie doel te ontdek en uit te leef. Ja, soms gaan dit hulle vir tye van jou af wegvat, maar jy het mos ook ‘n doel en roeping om na te streef. Leef jou eie lewe en laat jou naastes toe om dit ook te doen. Jy sal verbaas wees om te sien hoe baie jul lewenssirkels steeds kruis, maar sonder die ewige konflik omdat een of meer partye voel hulle versmoor.

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