Preparing for the bear

The brain is a very complex organ. It controls and coordinates everything from the movement of our fingers to our heart rate. It also plays a crucial role in how we control and process our thoughts, our emotions, and our actions.

The amygdala is best known as the part of the brain that drives the so-called “fight, flight or freeze” response, associated with fear and stress. When the amygdala stimulates the hypothalamus, it sends signals to the adrenal glands to produce hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol to prepare for action. 

From a biological standpoint, fear is a very important emotion. It helps us respond to threatening situations that could harm us. Its most basic purpose is to keep us alive when the bear attacks.

The problem is – we react to imaginary bears that are no longer in our forest. Daniel Goleman, the well-known author of the book Emotional Intelligence, talks of an amygdala hijack. This is when we allow the emotional amygdala to overreact, overruling our rational brain. The brain sees an emotional bear that is out of proportion in size and threat and tells the body that it's a life and death situation – sending our heart rate, breathing, and blood sugar sky high. 

It might be your partner raising his voice, or someone criticizing or scaring you. It takes the chemicals that are released during the amygdala hijacking only 6 seconds to dissipate – but the side effects can stay for hours, days, or a lifetime.

When we choose the fight, flight, or freeze, we are at the mercy of our reptilian brain and go into a shutdown. If we could sit out the 6 seconds of the chemical reaction in our brains, we could suppress the emotional reaction and allow our rational brains to take control. 

Understand this dynamic. Use this time to breathe deeply, focus on something pleasant and calm down. Then you will notice that there is no bear to fear or hide from.